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Lessons from the Pina Colada...

No, this isn't going to be a story about a moment of enlightenment that came after one too many Pina Coladas. (Although I've had such a moment. Actually, wait; it was Mojitos. But that's another story…)

Pina Colada; source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/randysonofrobert/635477891/

This past weekend on a longish solo drive, I discovered an 'oldies' station playing songs from the '60s and 70's. The song Escape (The Pina Colada Song), originally by Rupert Holmes in 1979, came on the radio.  While I remembered the chorus from somewhere in the recesses of my memory, I had never before really paid attention to the lyrics of this particular tune. This time, I listened attentively to the words of the song…and they gave me a moment of enlightenment.

In a nutshell, the song is about a man who realizes that he and 'his lady' have grown apart. He's tired of her, like a 'worn-out recording of a favourite song'. He reads an ad in the personals section of the newspaper, where some woman writes describing the mate she's looking for: someone who 'likes Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain'; someone who's 'not into yoga', and who has 'half a brain'. Knowing that he's being a little offside - as 'his lady' sleeps beside him - he writes back to this mysterious woman who seems to be his soul mate. He and the woman from the paper arrange a meeting days later to plan their escape…and when she walks in the door, lo and behold, it's her: it's 'his lady'. She'd been bored of him too. But the secret desires of their hearts turned out to be in sync after all…they just never knew.

Whether in the context of a relationship or anything else in life, if you want it, you've got to say so. And do so. Here was a couple who, for whatever reasons, both felt that they weren't getting what they needed or wanted anymore from the relationship, and who obviously didn't feel like they could openly share what they really did want with one another. They had gotten into certain habits with each other and lost touch - at least outwardly - with the real yearnings that were in their hearts; with the things that made them feel alive and vibrant. They had developed certain assumptions about what was and wasn't 'acceptable' in their relationship; about what the other did or did not like.

Here are the three lessons I got from The Pina Colada Song:

1. Know yourself. Your whole life through. You are always growing and evolving as you live your life. Your interests may wax and wane, and your values may shift over time: becoming less rigid, or becoming deeper and stronger. Keep in touch with those changes, and regularly examine who you are and what's important to you; it's one of the first steps in keeping your life aligned with how you most want it to be.

2. Speak your truth. However scary that might be. The couple in the song felt they couldn't share their true thoughts and desires with one another, but they learned a lesson when their eyes met at their secret meeting: by articulating what it is that you want, you open the door for it to come to you. You give yourself permission to go find it, and bring it into your life. We sometimes have to let ourselves be vulnerable in this step; we are often unsure of how those close to us will respond when we state what's in our hearts. But being the truest, most authentic you, is a richly rewarding way to live.

3. Pursue your heart's desire. Now, I'm not suggesting that you should go about this in the way that the couple from this song did, which was covertly and sneakily. I think it's dishonest and disrespectful. And I don't just mean in the context of a relationship. In any pursuit - be it personal or professional - it's important to be in integrity with whatever (or whomever) it is that you're pursuing. Do it the right way, and spare yourself (and others) the agony of having to live with actions that are anything less than scrupulous. Be in alignment…and then go for it. Fully.

When you take the time to delve into what makes you tick - regardless of what's made you tick in the past, or what you think is 'supposed to' make you tick - you can discover the things that really bring you to life. Sometimes, the answers surprise you. Who you were in the past does not necessarily dictate who you are now, or who you might be in the future. Keep in touch with who you are becoming through every season of your life, and have the courage to speak your truth. A life that's fully aligned with who you are is the way to live your most vibrant, most purposeful and rewarding life. Whether or not you like Pina Coladas.

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©2023 by Kelly Wagner

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