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Three Simple Steps to Care for Your Emotions (AND Your Lawn!) (Part II )

This week’s episode of Optimal Living is all about Healthy Emotions, and earlier this week I described how caring for your emotions is like caring for your lawn.  Today, I’m sharing three easy steps you can follow to care for both: simply Weed, Feed and Heed.

Step 1: WEED When we see weeds in our lawn, we want to get rid of them.  The same can be said of negative emotions; we want those bad feelings GONE as soon as possible.  But a good friend and I like to remind each other to first allow ourselves to “feel what you need to feel, and then decide how you want to deal”.   Sit with the negative emotions (or examine the weeds) and determine why they’re popping up in the first place:  are you neglecting your lawn and garden?  Is there something you’re not being attentive to?  What do you need to do differently to help curtail the “weeds” in your life?  Or perhaps someone else’s “bad seeds” are making their way onto your property.  If they won’t take care of their own “weeds”, perhaps you need a better boundary between your property and theirs.  Once you recognize the underlying cause of the problem, you’ll be better equipped to handle it.

That said, there are two main ways to get rid of weeds in the lawn:

Dig it out at the root

1) cut them down with the lawnmower - which does the job temporarily, but guarantees they’ll come back, often nastier than before - or

2) dig them out by the root.  The same goes for emotional issues.  We can mow down the bad feelings and toss them out or ignore them, but that doesn’t truly make them disappear; with this approach, they too are bound to reappear.  Getting to the root of the problem may be more difficult work than just “mowing them down”, but it’s the best way to solve problems at a deep and lasting level.

Step 2: FEED

Fertilize

If the only thing you do is dig out the weeds, you’ll end up with nothing but a yard full of holes.  Taking out the bad stuff isn’t enough; you have to FEED, adding good stuff into both your lawn AND to your life in order to keep things healthy.  For emotional well-being, that means knowing what makes you feel good, planting the seeds for those good things to germinate in your life and nurturing them so they take root.  Just as your lawn might need more water, sun, or the right kind of fertilizer or seed, you too can ensure that you’re feeding your soul with the things that lift your spirit and calm your emotions.  But remember:  you CAN have too much of a good thing.  In the same way that too much water can cause roots to rot, or too much fertilizer can burn the grass, there’s a distinct difference between, for example, having some time to yourself vs. spending too much time alone; or enjoying a nice glass of wine vs. drinking six bottles in one night.  So fill those holes in your lawn (and your life) with just the right amount of good stuff.

Step 3: HEED

Hands holding grass

“Heed” means to consider and be attentive to.  This isn’t a one-time “take out the bad, put in the good, and you’re set forever” project; you have to continually monitor conditions.  Your needs will vary depending on the “weather” that blows into in your life.  Just as we don’t have control over Mother Nature, neither do we have total control over everything that happens in our lives.  The city might decide to build a giant skyscraper next to your property, so what was once a sunny patch in your lawn is now shady and requires a different type of seed if it’s going to thrive.  Sometimes we go through seasons of drought; alternately, some regions get more rain than others, so you have to take care of your lawn (and your life) accordingly, depending on your circumstances.  Things can and do happen in our lives that change the landscape; it’s only when we remain attentive to our changing needs and heed the situation that we are equipped to nurture ourselves in the best way possible.

So this summer, whether you’re digging up the dandelions in your lawn or exploring those deep-rooted emotions, remember three simple steps: Weed, Feed, and Heed.

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Sunday's episode of Optimal Living has been pre-empted by a CSL soccer game on Rogers Ch. 20, but you can still take advantage of the special offers we have online, that can help you weed, feed and heed your emotional health: 50% discounts are available for holistic health counselling, homeopathy, Shiatsu and acupuncture, and copies of Deb DeJong's book D.A.N.C.E.: Five Steps to Living Your Best Life are available too, with a portion of the proceeds from book sales going to The Children's Wish Foundation.   (*update: offers have now expired)

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Here’s to a lush lawn and a lush life!

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©2023 by Kelly Wagner

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